Chris G’s Best Yelp Reviews: Sparadise – 4/5 Stars

Sparadise (Hollywood Thai Massage) – CLOSED
$$ Massage, Massage Therapy, Waxing
5909 Hollywood Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90028

A great deep tissue massage I had, mostly thanks to Groupon.

While I essentially paid as much as what I would have paid within a two-mile radius at any other Thai massage place with their ‘discounted’ $40 rate on Groupon, I felt like Sparadise was well worth the price. I actually got it for a discounted rate on top of another discounted rate for $28 due to a promotion on top of another promotion on Groupon, ha! They also offered a non-Groupon rate for three massages at $120 or so. I don’t feel bad or guilty for calling them out on milking Groupon because this massage place is really booming with their 1000+ buyers. Thus it seems like they have a pretty healthy business going on that survives around their Groupon deal. It’s also a smart idea in a way because it gets people like me in the door who otherwise wouldn’t come in.

This tiny place has a campy elegance about it and looks as fancy as a nice boutique hostel. The reception service is as appropriately shoddy as what I would expect from a $40/hour type of place, which I didn’t mind. Yesterday, I came in at 1 p.m. and the receptionist asked if I had a Groupon and looked for availability on her computer. She told me there was none and instead of giving me an appointment for tomorrow, she said someone would call me back about an appointment tomorrow. I guess I was on the ‘standby’ list until around 8:40 p.m. when I got a call from a 323 number and I answered the phone. I said ‘hello’ and the Sparadise receptionist emphatically said in a heavy Thai accent ‘massage – come in right now, come in right now!’ There apparently was a last-minute cancellation, I followed her orders and came in.

I came in at 8:50 p.m. (I live a mile away). The receptionist gave me an up-sell speech about getting the $120 rate for three massages and that she would happily cancel the Groupon. I politely said no way and filled out the form. She asked me what kind of massage I wanted. I said ‘deep tissue’. I didn’t know if they would even do deep tissue with the Groupon but she said okay. A few minutes later, she took me to a dark room and told me to unrobe but to keep on my underwear and lay face down on the massage table. I unrobed, put my wallet and my phone under my pants and shoes. I left my underwear on and waited with my head in the hole for what seemed like 10 minutes.

When the masseuse came in, she greeted me and began doing the deep tissue massage Thai style. She jumped up on the table and began standing on top of my upper calf using it as a balance as she began doing a dance between my calf and other parts of my legs, butt, and back. I was worried that she would fall off if I flinched so I tried to stay as still as possible. She then got off my calf and went through the motion of thoroughly kneading my back and it was painful but good. At some point, hot stones were dumped on top of my back and she caressed my legs with them and placed them on my hands. That really did nothing for me, but I am glad I experienced a ‘hot stone massage’ if that’s what it was. I emphasized wanting a hard massage on my shoulders and back and she delivered.

When it was over, a tiny mug of room temperature water was served over a table with a gratuity chart under the glass on top of the table that emphasized that the standard gratuity is $15-20 per massage. I thought half of that was more appropriate. That’s what this Groupon did for me and I am glad I came here. And I can now safely say that I am officially DONE with getting massages from Groupon.

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